Money, Money

clever_atomFaringdon Community College 04 December 2018

Money, money, my dear old friend

Paper, card, coins and more

The more we loan the more they lend

It keeps on going untill it makes us poor.

Money, money, whats up with you

You brought a crisis to these lands

The bankers have had enough with you

You practically leapt from our hands.

Money, money, what have you done

You've stripped our walls completely bare

You have taken away all our fun

Now all thats in our pockets is air.

Money, money, it's all your fault

It's not all yours to share

You've stolen our money from our vault

And taken it to your secret lair.

Money, money, when will you stop

Now we're just skin and bones

Now we can't go to a shop

Now we rest under our gravestones.

Money, money, my dear old friend

Paper, card, coins and more

The more we loan the more they lend

It keeps on going untill it makes us poor.

Comments (8)

clever_atom | Faringdon Community College
04 Dec 2018

Wow! I never thought I'd get another star
Reply to this comment
Olivia @ the BNC
04 Dec 2018

A very emotive poem, I've given you a star for the powerful storytelling. Well done! I wonder how one of the people affected by the crisis (for example, one of the people we met in the videos) might feel when reading this? What do you think, or what affect were you hoping to have when writing it?
Reply to this comment
ethical_brain | St Joseph's Catholic Primary School, Northfleet
05 Dec 2018

This poem is very descriptive and it gives you a lot of information about how it affects a person
Reply to this comment
victorious_snow | Elaine Primary School
05 Dec 2018

that is a really thoughtful thing to do. I never thought of that.(writing a poem)
Reply to this comment
placid_meerkat | Evelyn Street Primary School A
05 Dec 2018

Where did you get the idea of doing a poem from? Could you improve the poem by up-leveling your vocabulary?
Reply to this comment
placid_meerkat | Evelyn Street Primary School A
05 Dec 2018

Over all, it is a great, passionate poem.
Reply to this comment
1. clever_atom | Faringdon Community College
  placid_meerkat's comment 08 Jan 2019
  
  Thank you for the feedback. My Burnet News Club teacher asked us whether we wanted to finish the term with a post each and gave some suggestions about what we could do. I worked with one of my best friends so half of the credit goes to her.
  Reply to this comment
victorious_snow | Elaine Primary School
05 Dec 2018

I actually think the people would feel emotional and they will definately think back to the experienced time.This poem would be an exact copy of what happened to those people. The first four verses would be a pure reality because, of course, it talks about the loans and our their lending.

The other parts talks from everyone's view point and their experience: bankers public who ask money as loans and the money itself.They said about what happened in the past(You brought a crisis to these lands). Then they pointed out the present events happening(The more we loan the more they lend.Money, money, when will you stop
Now we're just skin and bones,Now we can't go to a shop.They have also said the chances which might occur in the future.(It keeps on going untill it makes us poor)

So overall, I think by using different technics, including emotive language, they have turned this poem into feelings.

Nice thoughts.
Reply to this comment